fanmail.

Dear Joel,

I realize that you are not the same producer, mentally, that produced Faxing Berlin wayyy back. You have grown, or rather, regressed into a boorish, immature rockstar; the model that I would like to think an EDM producer would avoid.

However, it is deeply troubling to me that you could call all DJs "cunts". I am saddened and upset by this, not because I am a DJ, but because I am sure YOU were a DJ at one point in your career. Have you forgotten what it's like to maybe go hungry for a little bit to get a new mixer, to dig through some crates of records to stumble across a release you wanted for months, to get people going with that great mix you practiced for a week?

I am scared, because, YOU influence young people. Not sane, sober, artistic minds; YOUR drug-riddled, shrinking brain controls thousands (maybe millions) of screaming teens and tweens. Instead of inspiring these minds to go and pick up a turntable/CDJ/whatever, you are telling them to go and get fucked up and party; I imagine your mentality is along the lines of "don't worry about making music, i've got it covered."

Unfortunately, that mentality of shutting down new ideas for your own production's benefit will NOT help in the long run. Because, frankly, we need role models in the scene; your comments set us back, and make us all look bad.

Have a great day,

Some Guy

In response:

If by "my friends" you mean people who would also insinuate that im a drug addicted egomaniac who put himself up on a pedestal for all the electronic musical world  to look up at, then i do believe they can go fuck themselves as well.

i can already tell you exactly what you know about me as a person... i dont have to sit here and wait for you to read a handful of stupid interviews and come back to me with your own verdict. Outside of my craft, i can already tell you that you don't actually know a thing about me. Which is perfectly fine by me, providing i don't have to be subjected to your fucking ramblings of a malformed role model you make me out to be based on a few snippets of internets here and there.

whether im globally conceived to be, or not, i don't aspire to be a role model, and i dont aspire to be a leader, prophet or all around advocate of anything other than "the silly shit i get up to when im in my element" which, ironicly enough, just so happens to be making music. Youll find this is probably a very common attribute to nearly anyone with even a hint of artistic freedom and an audience whos willing to listen.

so as for my comments making "us all look bad" do keep in mind that i am not a part of "us" and until the government intervenes or Cthulhu says otherwise, my career and life is pretty much run under a firm dictatorship by yours truly, and is not a fucking democracy. Ergo, people like you *can* freely chime in your two cents with your two opinions, and i can guarantee im probably not going to give a shit one way or another.

why respond? well... the thing that upsets me here is that people (today it's you) believe that theres still an element of "your doing it wrong" when it comes how i consciously choose to do things in a field that is supposed to be FAR from governed by outside sources, pka "the rest of us"

If this is something that scares you, then go be scared. If it's something that inspires you, then be inspired, and if its something you don't give a shit about, then dont give a shit. But for the love of god, don't put the self-rightous "you came from a low place and now you think youre the shit" rant on me. If i had a nickle for every time this has ever been said behind my back, i would be able to afford my own country by now.

THE MORE YOU KNOW.

now go email this same rant to the thousands of other successful artists who worked their way to the top of the fuckin EDM food chain from their mothers basements and have developed massive, justified delusions of grandeur, compile the replies, and make a fucking coffee table book so i can learn something about myself that i didn't already fucking know from some complete fucking stranger.



or.



you can just enjoy music.

weiiiii pichuresss!

this one cracked me up:

"Joels a cool guy and I'm sure he thinks its funny but its rude and demeaning to make those faces in all of his pictures with other people. Just smile man or something, don't be such a tard to people. Take a hint from Tommy, he does good fan pics"

i fuckin lol'd hard.

don't worry, when i derp.... i don't always herp. it's just my clever way of showing you and your camera that i love you.

Ed Hardly

reason #32 for not giving a deadmau5 a microphone:

Following the actions of some idiot who cracked open a bottle of champagne at Voyeur in SD and spraying it all "up in the club" like a baller-tard.

"HEY, douchebag....  yeah, you Ed Hardly im fuckin talking to you... thats right... Guess what? Take your Jersey Shore and get out the fuckin door."

For those who witnessed this... i love you. For those of you who witnessed this and recorded it, i love you more, but for those who witnessed this, recorded it, and uploaded it to youtube... i want you to have my babies.


-Joel

up the mainstream without a paddle.

it's obviously kinda hard to ignore the "sell out / mainstream" comments... but it's much easier to laugh at it when you actually take into account what exactly happened in your lifetime.

like 99 percent of the rest of the people my age, i still do remember what it was like growing up and being part of something unique and special, or bigger than yourself. The first, and most obvious examples of this in my life were simply the social circles that were prevalent in highschool. You had your long haired metallica rocker folk, the moody black wearing NIN clique, the vintage rock / Doors fans (which i never really got)... your hiphop crews and then the whatever the hell was top40 at the time guys.

Might have expanded here and there.. but to my memory, thats what i recall.  Im pretty sure everyone, including myself had some kind of connection to at least 1 or more people in every "group"... it wasnt so segregated that you were destined to be a part of any one particular "scene" ... but at least thats how it probably looked when you were  thrown into grade 9.

Over time, mostly non-conciously observing everything, people would probably shift paradigms from one association to another simply based on who they spent the most time with really. I had a few of these phases myself... hung with the goths, bought NIN albums... had friends who were i guess what people would NOW call hipsters... so hung with them from time to time... never really 100% nailing myself down into any one scene... since i was somewhat of a loser anyway... it didnt really affect much and it didnt really take long for any one group to be able to point out that "i wasnt really all that cool anyway"

But, like 90% of everyone, i did manage to get through highschool and make a handful of friends here and there.

I definatley didnt notice it then, but i certainly notice it now... but i think the reason why we even had all that shit, was just so that we could be identified to others as being a part of something unique and cool... and it usually worked better as the number of people who were on board with the same idea was increased. But of course... there comes this point where, when too many people hop onto one thing... wait... its not longer unique... so some disbandment takes place, and life goes on.

this is all too familiar to me right now.  Wasnt it only 4 years ago i donned some mouse head, and had a small core of fun fans (none of which could pronounce my name) and i travelled here and there and did this and that...  and the message was clear "Let's take this music and shove it down mainstreams throat" ... so we all happily rode along with that didnt we, and everyone wanted more... and i was more than happy to oblige. so we all started making new friends... and more, and more.

and now, well look at us! All grown up, 1 million + fans on FB, over 4 million tickets sold throughout the world, and the ONLY way to get that done was to bring in the heavy artilery that only a major label can provide...

now im rocking out on a 2 million dollar mouse cube, stage, lighting, LED head that WE ALL paid for. It's what we wanted isnt it!?  something BIG... something cool! It's fucking crazy... Everyone wanted a show, and i didnt my damned best to give it to em, and i will continue to do so, because thats what i want to do.

I'd still hold true to the original plot.... lets take this music and shove it down mainstreams throat.  seems alot of people are on board with this huh.. wait a minute... this is us? yes. we are them now it seems.

so now that some of us are undecided on what good came of all this is... let's take a look back and see whats changed?  Nothing much.  the production of the shows have certainly ramped up... thats not a bad thing... more and more people are getting to witness this, also not a bad thing. Im sitting here struggling to find that one BAD THING that's happened during this crazy upwards rollercoaster ride... no need to help me out if you think you can manage to spot it.. because im perfectly happy with all of it... excited in fact.

"selling out" means doing something against ones moral fibre for personal gain. i challenge one person to call me out on that, just so i can laugh while they fail miserably.

i take solace in the fact that i can, at any time, re-invent myself. Just even having the small thought in the back of my mind is all the comfort i need to get through my days on tour. There is no law written that says i cant just drop everything, right now, right this second, and do whatever i please for my own personal gain. I now have reached out to so many people, which is awesome, and affected them somehow, even if its a tiny 2 hour long part of their life, that it wouldnt be worth it.

how mindblowing do you think that feels? i wish i could describe it to you... but i really can't. And i wish the world worked in such a way that EVERY artist could feel what im feeling when im standing there like a deer in the headlights in front of thousands of people, nightly. But the best i can do for now, is just express my utmost thanks for your support that got me where i am today... even through all the bullshit, the rumors, the fuckups, the politics, the major label shit... you all pulled through for me. So when im up there in front of a crowd, just try to imagine how i feel... and you've all done the best i can ask for in reciprocating the feeling in more ways than i can count.

so, we took that music and shoved it down mainstreams throat.... what was it we wanted again? This record is going to be playing on for a little while longer it seems.

im sorry, i can't seem to find the stop button.

raves?

Am i the only person in the world who cringes when they hear the word "rave"? As in, am i the only person to think that it's more or less been so shifted out of context of what the term meant to me back in 1995-1999? I don't know why it irritates me so much, maybe its just because "back in the day" i had something unique and special to me... and now it seems that it's for someone else, so i guess it would be like something taken from you and found and loved by someone else some many years later... like an ex or something.

"Raves" to me have always been ... i guess, breaking into some basement in Kensington Market in Toronto back in 96... walking into an extremely dark / poorly lit network of cellars, of course puslating to the beat of whatever the flavor was at the time. Or possibly even hitting up the science center, for a more organized all nighter of complete and utter randomness and jungle.

Or the News, Hullabaloo, Citrus, Dose, Phlux in NY... all that shit... i dont recall ever buying a ticket to any of these raves on ticketmaster.com, or buying merch and fucktons of 12$ bottles of water.

it's just bizzare to me as to what passes off as raves these days... maybe this is one of those "hey im getting old rants" and i havent at all ruled out the idea that ... all this is definatley new to the younger generation of fun fur donning "ravers".. therefore its a big exciting thing for them... so why the hell get so depressed to hear about some kid who's been in "the scene" they call it, for no more than 36 minutes, telling me im not a part of it?  Absolutley right though. most times, i dont feel a part of it, personally... if i can connect with it via my music, and vicariously be involved with the newer "scene" then great.... but i still have to think that it came and went for me.

its pretty hard to explain.

PSA: 15 stuffs you may or may not have known.

im gunna keep this one simple, but here's the rundown.

1. I am not a Disc Jockey.  There is no jockeying of discs going on.

2. I just make music and produce shows.

3. Sometimes i run out and buy nestle  iced tea mix and just eat the powder with a teaspoon while watching Hoarders.

4. Meowingtons is my cat, his full name is "Professor Meowingtons PhD."  yes i am obsessed with him.

5. I try not to stick to one genre of Electronic Music. Ive been known to dabble in just about everything.

6. The green thing on my neck is a space invader.

7. I dont really like getting my photo taken, not because i dont like getting my photo taken, but because i dont really like physical contact all that much... i tend to cringe away when someone tries to put their arm around me. I just dont like being touched really. It's just a thing i have, nothing personal.

8. Everyone always ask me what my tattoos mean... well they dont really mean anything, i just like tattoos.

9. When am i coming to X city?  I'll get there eventually, ive been touring my ass off to please everyone, and eventually we'll schedule an event near you, so dont worry.

10. what do you think about X DJ or Producer. I dont really have any opinions on anyone else, just because i can clearly see how opinionated everyone is about me, and how much it always goes back and forth... i dont bother putting those opinions on other people who are probably just as passionate as i am about making music or performing.

11. I live in the lovely city of Toronto, Canada.

12. I dont think i've sold out. To me, selling out would mean doing something against my morals for cash. So far, i haven't done that. And my music certainly hasn't and wont change towards a direction that isnt something im not feeling.

13. I dont particularly enjoy interviews... only because many of them are the same questions over and over again and arent very creative / interesting at all. Its usually the same old: how did you come up with the name deadmau5, how do you feel about playing X event, how is it different than other parts of the world, etc etc YAWN.

14. If youre not a DJ then how come youre doing X event or are involved in X poll, etc etc. Honestly, i dont know. But it's cool. Electronic music is so etched into DJ culture that it's almost completely unavoidable to be associated. I dont have any problems with that, but i am aware of the gross misconception of unnoticeable difference between Producers and DJ's (who are very often both) and producing a show. One of my goals in life is to make it more clear, it's an uphill battle, but at least its challenging and interesting!

15. Drugs don't really do anything for me. I've never bothered to indulge in that lifestyle, but on the same note, i am not anti-drug. I have enough respect for humans to let them make their own choices, whether they seem stupid to me or not. The type of people i CANT stand tho, are those who impose lifestyle choices onto others... THATS something i hate right there. I don't think theres anything more annoying in society than people who feel the need to force their idea of an ideal lifestyle onto someone else. Thats just cheap. I wont elaborate, but, you get the idea.

etch-a-sketch's are fucking evil.

Okay, try this one on for size... last nights dream:

Im not too sure why, but for some reason or another i was in some fast food joint somewhere in Australia.... the usual, talking smack, eating a burger with some friends tho i cant seem to recall who they were...  There were a bunch of dudes sitting across the table from ours... and they were talking shit... im not even sure what, but i knew it was directed at me and it wasnt pleasant. So i pushed my chair back, walked over to their end of the table and got in their face... i think more along the lines of saying something like "you wanna say that again?" or some other random tough guy shit like that.... so apparently the repeated whetever it was, and i just cocked back for a second, and punched the guy in the face pretty much as hard as i could.

So, i guess it was on... were were scuffling about... at least in that slow-motion retarded way that you would when youre dreaming anyway... and next thing i remeber is taking a step back and theres a cop standing right there. basicly everything stood still right there and i just figured... oh fuck.

running over the situation in my mind, i remeber thinking, the absolutle worse thing that coul happen really is that i get taken to jail overnight and pay some kinda bail / fine... whatever. So... im kinda bummed out as he's slapping the cuffs on me. Then another cop shows up and cuffs the other 2 idiots as well.

I was with someone familiar at the time, can't make out who it was... but i know i wasnt alone when the cop drove us off. Anyways, we end up in this massive warehouse... mostly full of mattresses and old clothes and shit.... and the cop told us to start moving all this fibreglass padding shit from one end of the warehouse to another... so i figured wtf... and started doing it...  seemed like we were only moving shit for like 15 minutes, then the cop comes back at us... gives us 25 bucks each and lets us go.

how bizzare i thought... oh well! I remeber thinking how awesome it was that the other pricks were probably in jail getting assraped while i just made 25 bucks moving some shit around in a warehouse. Neat.


Next scenario i find myself floating around a road, driving most likely, and looking out the window... it reminded me of vancouver... more noteaby that sea to sky highway bit... im looking over the cliffside and the watter keeps rising and falling t o and from street level... then we ended up in my house somehow.

I was reading some tech magazine and i spot an article in there about some kind of etch-a-sketch drawing contest.... somehow this got me really pumped so i went and got an etch-a-sketch.  I was fiddling with the thing for a little bit, and then i had this great idea.... so  i setup a camera, and took a pic of the blank etch-a-sketch.... then i started to fill it all in with pure lines... then took another pic of it completely filled in with lines.... then i thought i'd photoshop the hell out of it and stamp in a graphic / composite of the 2 photos of like a mona lisa or something so it looked like i had mad etchasketch skills... so i ended up totally cheating and doing that... and we submitted my photo to this tech magazine... and they came back and basicly called us out for cheating... but somehow gave me another chance to retry... i was relieved.

SO!!! another brilliant idea.... i run out and grab an Audrino board and a couple of digitally controlled motors, and i wrote this script / software that parsed an EPS file ... and controlled these motors to turn the etch-a-sketch knobs accordingly to get an insane image on the etch-a-sketch...

came out perfect.... so we took tons of photos of the etch-a-sketch thing and sent those photos in.... i was all ... this is genius...  again, the magazine came back to me and said... dude... we know this is fake... so i was all.... "okay okay you got me... " and then i explained to them how i programed this audrino / motor rig to control the knobs on the etch-a-sketch to output an EPS file to the etch-a-sketch controls...   and they were all "whoa! really?"  cool!

so that perked their interests at least... and they called me up and said they wanted to come over and do a piece on it... and take vid / pics and shit.... so i thought, okay, i didnt win the contest, but at least this is still kinda rad...


So these guys show up with their cams and gear and shit... and ive got my 2 motor / audrino rig setup for them to check out... and the "director" was all... hmmm... lets put like a plastic dummy over the motors and bits... like a mannequin of sorts... so that it looks like some dude is actually doing it. So im all.. yeah whatever, cool. and then they started to fit this weird rubbery humanoid figure over my rig.... which started to become more and more real...

i finally had a chance to look at my surroundings while this rubbery human type thing was being fitted on my etch-a-sketch rig... and it turned out we were in some sort of dank cave / cavern.... REAL medieval like.

So anyway... this rubber humanoid figure whos starting to look really fuckin evil now, is twicting about due to the motors being driven underneat it... and making this perfect etch-a-sketch drawing.
 So while that thing is whirring away, i look around this cavern and i start to hear these fucking grumbles and crackles from all over the place.... so i look back at the floppy rubber human thing again, whos looking insanely evil now, and it starts talking backwards while still whittling away on this etch-a-sketch.... now im fuckin freaked out... trying to figure out what the fuck is going on with this thing.... now its just me and the etch-a-sketch demon, in a cave, everyone else is gone..


as for the crackling / grumbling sounds... i looks around inside the cave and i start to see shit come out of the dirt... skeletons and shit mostly... and weird corpsey things start hissing around and walking in from around corners.... i mean, it was clear, this etch-a-sketch robot thing was conjuring up the dead and shit... didnt have much time to take any of it in really...

then i woke up to pauls fucking phone ringing.